Being upset and angry with your partner and perhaps hurt, the last thing on your mind is showing physical affection. In couples counseling, I generally recommend that a Master List of Required Household Chores be written down, which is exhaustive and comprehensive. Maybe one or both of you like to be spanked? Is your partner not quite as attractive as when you first got together? They may be avoiding a partner who wants sex more than they do, but they also seek to avoid confronting their own low desire. Planning can help you anticipate being together, making the coming experience more exciting. When we watch the evening news, or read news outlets online, they are often talking about us as gay men. As a result, unfortunately, sexual anorexia can set in for any couple, gay or straight. Relationship Therapy with Same-Sex Couples contains several features for you to utilize in your own practice, including the Sexual Orientation Matrix for Supervision SOMS to assist supervisors and trainers in preparing supervisees to work with lesbian, gay, and bisexual clients. Lastly, this essential sourcebook reviews several articles, book chapters, books, and Web sites that are relevant to same-sex couples and the therapists who work with them. Gay male relationships where there is a parenting factor involved differ from straight relationships mostly in that same-sex parenting needs extra support. They often break up, thinking that there is nothing they can do to fix their impasse. For gay male couples, loving and accepting the self individually and in context of each other, and society at large, can be a challenge. Sex— Gay male couples tend to approach sex differently. So, part of my job in couples counseling is to help gay men understand this, and to avoid making direct comparisons to straight relationships all the time some of the time is OK, particularly in confronting double-standards and internalized homophobia. Gay men of color face a dual challenge in managing social reactions and pressures from being both gay and people of color, and also gender expectations.